Top 5 Girl Crushes
Valentine's Day - love is in the air however sometimes our affection isn't directed to the usual parties. I think we all have crushes on members of the same sex and it doesn't make us gay, or want to shag them. Maybe a movie star, or rock star, or a certain Ravens head coach catches your eye and there's an attraction, admiration, appeal - whatever A word you want to use. As I was watching Fashion Police the other day (don't judge, Joan Rivers has a hilariously mean plastic mouth on her) they featured an up-and-coming actress that made me so warm I didn't need my Snuggie. She's now #1 on my top 5 Girl Crush list.
1. Amber Heard - seriously. She's my childhood idol, Barbie, come to life. So perfectly pretty I just want to stare at her and wonder why she doesn't spend all her time looking in the mirror. So gorgeous it's impossible to be jealous of as she's clearly not human. And guys she's currently dating a woman so go ahead and have fun with that little tidbit.
2. Cindy Crawford - Back in the 80s and 90s she was my idol for being a supermodel, of course, but also because she had brown hair and brown eyes just like me! Maybe that's why I've always liked her? Maybe it was the Pepsi Super Bowl commercial? Maybe because she's aged so well and is still smokin' hot? I know it's not that mole. I think it's the George Michael Freedom video.
3. Sofia Vergara - duh. She makes me uncomfortable with her boobs all everywhere and her friendly smile and her pretty face and that accent. She's all hotness and she seems so approachable and nice. Hate her. Love her. I'd kiss this girl and probably like it.
4. Smurfette, Judy Jetson, Wilma Flintstone, Daphne, Jem - man these chicks had it easy. Most didn't have to change clothes and when they did a magic closet did it for them. They were tall and thin or short and blue and had their pick of a whole village of men. Truly outrageous rock star? Check. Excellent bowler husband with possibly calloused feet? Yup all set there too. Choice between crime-fighting perpetually stoned hippie and a stuffy WASP? Lucky. Probably making out in flying cars! I miss Saturday mornings. Maybe I shouldn't drink so much on Friday nights.
5. Justin Beiber - So adorable. I just want to fold her up and put her in my pocket and love her and pet her. Such a sweet face. What's that? Not a girl? Prove it.
Oh I could go on. Michelle Obama, Eva Mendes, Julianna Margulies, Betty Crocker, Beyonce, Hermione Granger, your mom, the St Pauli Girl, Megan Fox, Mila Kunis, etc. But I will tell you one thing - I absolutely do not crush on Zooey Deschanel. I'm so tired of the whole "omg, I'm so quirky and adorable and oh guess what?! I sing too" schtick i just want to punch her in her bangs. xoxo
